Norman Rockwell's "Freedom from Want"

Thanksgiving hasn’t been as commercialized as Halloween or Christmas. It doesn’t have a retail market. The day still primarily is reserved as a family gathering around a big meal of turkey and the fixings. Of course, the meals vary by region, and the family dinners are not always harmonious. It has its myths, like all our holidays, but I think it still focuses on one aspect of life that often is ignored. Taking time to express gratitude, in more than just a few perfunctory prayers or in a journal, has been increasingly rare. My paternal grandfather always celebrated July 4th with gratitude for a new life as an immigrant. The recognition of the day to him had little to do with the event long ago.

As part of my mindful meditation practice, one step is to journal three things for which I’m grateful. It can be expressed in a variety of ways so that it doesn’t become perfunctory. I’ll admit that it has been a great fault of mine that I did not always express gratitude. In fact, for many years I was an ingrate. I had to grow outside of myself to experience the benefits of gratitude. It’s a lot more than just “Thank You.” We expect that as a matter of common courtesy. We’re supposed to reciprocate for a gift with a card, or at least a phone call. Emails don’t count.

Gratitude is an expression of a benevolent heart. If we are only focused inward toward our needs, then we can’t fully experience true relationships with other people. That’s not just warm, fuzzy feelings. It’s an emotional state that is established in our mindset and our lifestyle. If we’re still grasping for more, we can’t be grateful for what we have. Gratitude really isn’t about things. It’s about our relationship with God and with others. The epitaph on my mother’s gravestone is: “The Lord Loves a Cheerful Giver.” She was never happier than when she was giving to others. It was her expression of love.

Why is Thanksgiving celebrated only in six countries? I don’t know. I guess it’s how our traditions have developed over time. In America it goes all the way back to 1789. The tradition of the Pilgrims in 1621 has been questioned, at least as far as whether the Indigenous people were included. Virginia claims an earlier celebration in 1619. The early events were considered a religious ceremony. The holiday was made famous by a cover drawing for the Saturday Evening Post by Norman Rockwell. It was an idealized multi-generational family gathering. Few families are that perfect.

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